How many times can we start over in life?

When I was a little girl I had a dream of a life in flow, where I grew and was my life develop as prescribed as normal.

Education, job, marriage, kids, retirement, death.

Instead I got a life filled up with different kind of violence… and I have experienced several sudden changes in life that made me realize that I would never live a so called normal life.

I believe that is why I’ve opened the Lounge – go with the flow be happy and glow. Because no matter what I’ve experienced I’ve always tried to be happy and positive. And I know many tricks to a great mindset.

Later I realized that being with people who hide information and lie to me about my relations is the worst kind of violence, because when staying with these kind of people, I never got out of my bad role. Reacting to people lies and hidden information in front of them. To their face.

These kinds of revelations can bring really rough reactions with them.

I have been yelled at that I should go to the doctor and get a fix from my brain disease. I have been called weak, ugly, lazy, pathetic, stupid, bad educated.

I have even been asked to go to the doctor’s to get a diagnose so that I could get the help I needed.

But the thing is, people give me these kinds of reaction when I tell them they bully me or they lie.

They react with their sort of violence and I either leave or defend myself.

I have even sit in a car with my 7 year old baby, we were both on the backseat and the driver yelled at me for more than 5 minutes.

I started yelling after asking the driver several times to stop.

Then I asked to get of the car and he denied. I called the police, they wouldn’t help.

I had to spend 5 more hours with this person until he finally drove me home.

So.

How do I keep smiling?

I see that what they do is on their account.

And then I reinvent my life again.

I treasure my values and I do my routines that makes me strong and mindful about my own life.

But when not knowing about my values many years ago I took some choices that made my journey even longer and maybe also more hurtful.

But I dont regret.

And I know that I can reinvent my life even if it is tuff.

Did you start all over and reinvented yourself.

Share in comments or to anna@calledda.com

Be your best friend every day.

Tons of love

Anna

Life in Pieces

This post is not a about a ruined life in 1000 pieces,

it is about getting these 1000 pieces to fit together,
in order to live a grateful life in peace.

One of the first time that my life pieces got a wake up call
was when I had a course called Language and leadership.

The best course ever with the best teacher ever, Michael J Capek.

He taught me to see the fact, that when we are born, we are born
into the communication of other people.

Since communication is almost in all we do, we thereby are born

into other peoples habits, life view and other peoples truth.

This means that if you are born into a family of yelling people.

Yelling becomes a normal.

This was a fact to me. But actually I don’t like yelling, and when
I yell myself, I get so sad,
that it can take me days to forgive myself.

Later on I realised that I yell when I get into fight or flee mode.
When I don’t have capacity or skills to handle a situation ..

And with the course of Language and Leadership I began
having other conversations with my self.

And a big part of my life’s puzzle started to fit.

With knowledge came understanding and with that
came place to forgive and grow.

Because when I realised that other people too are born into
what is normal to them. Then it was so much easier for me to
forgive and have compassion, but still take care of myself.

It was a really beautiful period in my life.

Then I realised that when I stick around people
with a negative or a closed mindset
– I start be like that myself.

And that is not at all healthy for me.

What is healthy for me is to stay with people
who without even knowing it,
help me makes my pieces fit.

So how do I know that they make my pieces fit?

I feel uplifted when I have been with them, even during
tough times.

I feel hopefull

I feel strong

So listen carefully to yourself and the signals of your body.

Some times I feel ambiguity – in some way a person
makes me feel good, but on the other way, I am not sure.

Then I give people a change, not an ultimatum but I try
to figure out by their actions how they make me feel.

Do you know this feeling when life puzzles together and
you feel the beauty of life?

And do you do anything to maintain in.

Let me know, let us share the pieces of knowledge
that make the puzzle of life meaningful.

Thanks

Anna Ulrike

Piece 4 love

Ps If you want to know yourself better,
I may have something for you. Check it out.

Patterns Make Strong

In every aspects of life, patterns make strong.

In the daily routines you create one or two patterns that helps

you reach the goal you’ve set.

One day you’ll see that you came far.

What kind of patterns do you need to create
in order to develop your life in the direction you wish?

Do you know what you wish for?

It can be difficult if you are stuck in dysfunctional relationships
since they create negative flow, but you can do it.

This was just a reminder of what can help you on the road
to a nice and peaceful flow in life.

I wish you the best

Anna Ulrike

ps. I have created a Patreon page – where you every month
get new inspiration on life and life strategies.
Become a Patron!

Go With The Flow Even if Crisis

Thank you for reading my long post from last week,

I really needed to empty my head in order to get further

with my project
The Lounge – Go with the Flow, be happy and glow.

I started it 2 years ago and had a great succes, even if I in that
same period became a single mom.

The Lounge had 33 members and I shared all my knowledge
about life in order to show how to
Go with the Flow even during crisis.

Then I flew back to Denmark from Italy with my 8 month old
child. And then I got back into bad habits – which I had try
to leave when going to Italy in the first place.

I couldn’t justify my flow, because in someway due to all
the confusion from the outside, I became really negative.

It took me 2 years to get out of the bad habits and…

When I realised that no matter what there will always
be a flow in life a negative or a postive…

I wanted to create the positive flow
– a flow that I can follow in order to live in
peace with myself and my talents –

Here I share with you –
how I try to stay in that flow; no matter what…

  • Breathing
  • Listening to the answer from the Universe/God/My Intuition
  • Presenting myself for 3 possibilities
  • Create my own soup from the possibility I chose
  • Using the metafors the Pink Sky and the White Egg
  • Stop using screen when not working
  • Quit eating sugar.

When I get out of balance, it can take me a couple of days to
get back on track, specially when I forget to use these strategies.

And this is what I wanted to share with you, even if crisis, these
strategies can help you to think clear and stay on track.

The first and most important is to breath:

Thanks for reading.

Wish You the Best

Anna Ulrike

ps. If you have any questions, don’t hesitate,
send me an email : anna@calledda.com

What I wanted to know

What I wanted to know,

without knowing that I wanted to know it.

Because if you don’t know anything about a subject
you cannot even ask questions about it.

And I didn’t know anything about how much violence

and abuse actually affects my life, or affected…

Now I know better

and I have the responsibility to step up and do better.

But it takes a lot to make “do better” a habit.

We are born into other peoples habits
of language and behaviour.

And we learn that these habits are normal and ok,
even if some of them are not good or suitable
for a lovely and meaningful life….
and we take these habits with us, ….
if we are not conscious in every moment of our life.

I have been very conscious and have unchosen kids for many
years because I knew something was wrong,
not with me,
but with my learning and understanding of what I could aim
for and what I deserved in my life.

And then as 40 years old I get the lovely chance of creating a
traditional family, I took it,
but the dream cracked and now as 42 year old I’ve been
spending one year in figuring out how to live a happy life
with my son.

Of course I got hit by the past,
but luckily my age and my experiences in life had
made me a conscious parent.
That doesn’t mean that I believe that a young mother
cannot be a conscious parent.
But with my background and my story it was the best for me
to be a late mum.

Because if I had known that the abuse and violence
that I’ve experienced could affect me in the way it did
later on in my life.
Then I would have certainly done something about it before…
but I didn’t know it then…

Now I realised that my bad experiences have messed up my
habits and thereby my dreams and the work I did
for achieving them,

because I continued to live my life in bad cycles.

Of course a lot of good things had happened
and I am who I am.

But for a long time in my life after realising
my deeper challenges of my past,
I couldn’t stop thinking about which choices in my life
would have been different
if I didn’t continue to be with abusive people.

But really
I didn’t know about the affects of trauma

until
I got my own child,

until I got thrown back into my own past
and realised what has happened when I was a tumbler.
Because in difficult situations with my son,
I realise what I instinctively want to do.

Luckily with the knowledge I have now, I know it’s wrong,
so I have to find a new way of fixing the situation with my son.
And after fixing that situation I have to spend some time with
fixing my wounds from my time as a tumbler.
Because my instinct tells me what happened to me,
when it tells me what to do to my son in a difficult situation.
And sometimes that really hurts. Because it is not something
I want to do.

And if I knew that my problems as a teenager derived
from my trauma as a tumbler,
then I would have done something about it. But I didn’t.

And if I knew that my traumas as a teenager would affect my
pre adult life, then I would have done something about it.
But I didn’t.

I believed that I could handle the traumas myself
but I couldn’t.

And for a long time I didn’t know I was living in abusive
relationships, friends, work, family…

Now I know myself better,
and everyday I work on knowing myself better
and how to deal with myself in difficult
and challenging situations.

I know myself enough to know my limits, my joys,
my sorrows and it gives me this lovely inner peace,
even if chaos is around me.

I know my shadow sides and I also know when I fuck it
all up. And I can say sorry.

How about you ?

Do you know yourself ?

Can you say sorry when you hurt somebody?

Can people tell you sorry?

The better you know yourself –
the better you know other people too.

Thanks for reading.

Do you have any questions about life let me know.

Send me an email anna@calledda.com

To Feel Deselected & What to do about it

Sometimes in my life I have felt that I was deselected
from a group. A part of family. Friendships.
Friends from sport, school, colleagues…

When they did something together without inviting me.

This article is about the vocabulary meaning of “deselect”,
how I feel about it
and how to deal with it, when feeling deselected.

The meaning of deselected is this:

So the 2nd meaning deselect is
that a person is rejected from a certain position.

Normally it would be in politics, but still –
the physical meaning of deselect is to reject and
thereby take something away from somebody that
they was a part of.

That can hurt quite bad. Special in family.

There are many reasons for not wanting to see another person,
one to one. And the other party of course needs to respect that.
And that calls out for another article.

Here I look more if you are deselected from a group.
In groups you are excluded of something that you normally
is a part of.

Because when you are deselected you are also
in the same time excluded. You are not part of that group.

Of course in some occasion you cannot be together always.

But when you instinctively can feel the bad energy
in your body and mind,
then it is because you could have been part of that event,
and you would have invited if you took the initiative,
because you feel the togetherness.

And when the togetherness is not returned. Then it hurts.

I remember that the feeling I was left with,
realising I was deselected, was really hurt.

I felt lonely, I felt a big black whole in my stomach.

I couldn’t think clearly, I got confused
when I had to do things that I normally do without even thinking.
I felt sad, some days I ate a lot, other days nothing.
I couldn’t keep up with appointments,
I didn’t brush my teeth regularly…

I wanted to escape even if I was in my own apartment, while
at the same moment I wanted to hide.

It could take days to get back on track, and in the mean time
I’ve lost important appointments or cancelled work,
because I didn’t have energy to do anything afterwords.

So when I realised that I had to change life style, it helped a lot.

Like really a lot.

But when I became a mum I got back in the trap,
and got back in old habits, old communications with people

who in the end doesn’t wish me my best on my behalf,
more on their behalf, and that doesn’t work.

(I’m gonna write about that in a future post, the most important skill in communication, self communication)

So I realised that I was back in a mill that didn’t work,
I realised it by writing journal every day.
I was trying to be part of a group,
who in one way exposed their wanting for a relationship,
but I couldn’t get to know the rules fully,
and I could se that I was not part of the important
collaboration of each other wellbeing and grow.

I felt like a check on a to do list.

So when I tried to speak my experience
I got met with contra accusations, denial or even silence.
Like: It’s your own fault or we didn’t know….
or that was not what happened.
So what is happening is that my feelings of a situation are
denied of the people creating that feeling in me.

That is so mind fucking that it should be illegal.

It takes me 2-3 days to get over experiences like this.

So again I was left with no time for working consistently
and with progress. And a baby to take care of.

And when I realised that
even when I was with my son I had all this in my head,
I couldn’t concentrate on his needs,
and one day I even started to yell at him,
just because he wanted me to help him.

I excused to him immediately and I cuddle him
I feel that he forgave me.

But I really realised what deselection can do to a person,
and I can handle it when I am alone, but now I am a mum,
I have to have clear lines and nurturing relationships
that makes me feel good. Even if we don’t agree.
And that is what I choosed to concentrate about.

Honest long term relationships, that help me feel comfortable,
who tells me when I do wrong,
who tells me sorry when they did me wrong.

I want to be a calm mum with time and energy for my kid.
And I can only be that when I can trust that I know what
people think about me, I can trust that I know the rules
and trust that I am a part of the bigger picture
in collaboration with that group.

I mean – I am not a teenager anymore, I am grown up person,
43 years old,
and I know that when my mind is busy being in fight or flight mode
I don’t get anywhere.

I felt like an ingredient in other peoples soup.

So my cure was this.

I created my own soup.
What do I like in the soup and what do I not like in that soup.

And then when I have listed the positive ingrediens
I got a chok seeing what/who was on that list or not.

I realised that some people makes me feel that I am not good enough,
that I should do better, without knowing how,
that I am this little check on the to do list,
then I get nervous and it affects my daily life
and my chances to work with a flow.
And that has spoiled a lot of opportunities my way.

This is why I share this with you.
Step away from people saying you are the drama queen
when it is actually them making drama
when you feel excluded or deselected.

I am grown up in family where deselection
was a part of the culture, so when I was little I got my own
defence mechanism. Some of them not healthy at all,
but I didn’t know better until I became a mum myself
and experienced the same.

With a child I had to create a totally new soup,

and I started by cutting of all my time on social media,
only 30 minutes a day,

and then I started following you tubers who talked about bullisme.

I made daily journal
in order to be sure that I didn’t remember things wrong.

I cut down my own to do list with 75%
in order to be able to recover well
and to be able to be a good mum for my son.

I am not a victim –
I am a lightworker and that is why I disrupt behaviour like that.
And yet again that is another story.

If you want more knowledge about bullisme
you can find Chateau Marie right here,
todays quote on her blog is that there is no reason to be a victim
if people throw stones at you.
You can build something of what they throw…
And that is what I am doing…

Thanks for reminding me.

Thanks for following.

Thanks for liking and commenting.

All the Best

Anna Ulrike

Piece 4 Love

ps. this blog has changed from being a sustainable fashion blog to a blog about life. I realised that I have never known myself which has brought a lot of unnecessary conflicts and disruptions in my life. I realised late in my life that the dysfunctional experiences in my childhood has had a really big impact and affect on why I have had so many problems, and this is why I share with you, so you faster than me can enjoy your life to the fullest.

Don’t try to fit in – You already do

When I arrived here at the planet in this body,
I had some difficulties in finding out how do I fit in?

3 thoughts really occypying my mind. 

Why all this asfalt? 

Where are all my horses?

And how come the adults treat us kids so bad?

Yelling at us, maybe hitting us,
and maybe other real cruel things.

Then putting us into institutions with other adults..
maybe not that cruel in Denmark
but still the languages of the adults could be so harming
and surpressing – 

That sometimes I thought –

why did they even work here
or why did they even wish me here on earth. 

Then I had a realisation
(I was playing with some toycats and I got angry with GOD
because he didn’t play with me and the cats and
that I had to sit here all by myself)

…the realisation was that I had been here before,
and there was something I didn’t learn last time I was here…
and then came to me that I chose myself to come again,
because of the unfinished business.

It was before I met my best friends mum who is Buddhist.

I think I was about 3-4 years old.

Today I am 43 years old. 

I have never fittet into society 

I have never found a ”real” job

I don’t have a house or a dog or a car

I don’t have a pension

But what I do though have is

time

a good payable apartment 

a bigger life experience than I ever imagined,
and I want to experience more

I have had the pleisure to be a home mommy
with my son for 2 years from when he got born,
I’ve paid it myself, instead of saving the money
I got from my beloved grandmother now on the other side.

It was a choice,
and I am so grateful today that I ’ve had that possibility.
Thank You Grandma <3

 Time ago my Astrologer JonnaStardust told me to see
my self as a butterfly that flies from place to place.

And actually – when I think like that I fit in.   

I don’t fit in when I think of me being a working
human being from 7-16.

But I love to work. But in another way.

Now in this era of human beings life we don’t only need clarity,
now we also need force and action in order to save the children. 

Why do I say this, because it’s the most important action
we can do in order to create a world where everybody
feel they fit in. 

But not by producing more toys or clothings,
but by producing more consciuos parenting and we do that
by creating more conscious living first. 

By saving our self first from past guilt and past traumas. 

And starting to work with our children,
the nature and with the animals and not against them.

And my biggest message

here is our soul is not hurted from our traumas – 

 We cannot hurt the soul,

only the body and the ego mind can get hurt.

Because remember when we meditate; we say –

I am not this body nor am I this mind – 

So what has happened to us in every past

harmed our body and our mind 

but never our soul. 

This is why souls come back in order to finish

what they came here for. 

If the mission is not fulfilled the souls will come back,

no matter what happened in previous times here on earth.

Souls, just like you and I

We are all free 

We are all equal 

We are untouchable

And we already fit in.

This means that

when you litterally
can step away from your ego
and your mind

(and your circumstances and the people around you ),
then you start feeling
your soul and you can start working from there. 

This is what I did and still do –  in order to let my soul rule,
and wauw did it rule in this post,
never had I ever let my mind and ego that much away. 

I felt like I fitted just perfectly in.

Anna Ulrike 

Piece Love

PS. Would you like to get some exclusive knowledge
on how to deal with change in life ?

Change Life

How to be successful when broke

My latest blogpost was about success, (Give Up & Get Success)

but can we be successful

if we are broke?

Many years ago being a student, life felt a bit broke

economically speaking.

In a period where I really wanted to travel every summer

and didn’t have that much money in the bank,

I still managed to travel once a year. And maybe even twice.

And this is how I did it:

I sold stuff and clothings I didn’t use anymore.
And I was kean on cleaning my clutter often.

I stopped buying freezing bags and used either
tupperware I already had or the bag from the bread
I bought in the supermarket.

I stopped buying plasticbags when grocery shopping.
(In Denmark we pay for them)

Furthermore I saved money on the electricity bill

by shutting down all standby devices when not in use.

I always had a little sandwich or fruit with me when
going out so I could avoid spending money on food.

And of course I had my own perfect water bottle.
(In Denmark a 0.5 l bottle of water can easily cost 2 eur)

Just by changing small things

in my daily habits of consumerism

I saved a lot of money. And I could travel.

The thing is, at that moment when studying, and being

broke, I didn’t feel that successful. I felt as a broke student.

But then today, when I look back,

I actually find myself quite successful as a broke student.

I managed to travel and live in my apartment – and study.

Being broke.

That’s actually not broke.

That’s prioritising once resources and that’s a successful
skill in my opinion – today.

I just couldn’t see it then.

Are you able to look at yourself and give yourself credit?

I hope so, you deserve it just as much as I did.

With love

Anna Ulrike
Piece 4 Love

ps. remember that all the month of July you can get
access to exclusive knowledge on how to empower yourself
under change. Check it out here:

Change Life

pps. I now realise that not only did I save
money like this, I actually also save energy and
I save the world for unnecessary production an garbage.

Values – do you know your own?

Values plays a big role in how we live our life,

because
values are the principles and standards of behaviour;
of what is important in life.

From what you spend your time on doing – is where you
create your future.

This is why it is so important to know ones values in order
to create the life that make you happy.

I actually didn’t know that when I was 20.

I started to hang out with people with whom
I had one interest in common.

But there was a lot of situations where we didn’t
have the same values. But I sticked to that group,
and I actually had a lot of conflicts, just because …

we didn’t have the same values.

Furthermore I was grown up with a
lot of discussions about whether my
values and wishes was justified.

Of course
all wishes and values cannot be met,
but at least they can be listened to and acknowledged.

Sometimes when we are told something several times
we start believing in it, specially when we are children
and trust with our hearts the primary care person/s
in our life.

I didn’t know that I had to live
by my values in order to create a life based on what I like.

So instead of going all in
– creating my life on my own values,
I kept created a life based on other people’s values.

So actually I was never happy deep down, only ok.

Maybe sometimes I got a little insane because my
inner voice told me something but my inner pleaser
wanted me to do something else.

And for many years I struggled between
pleasing other people
and figuring out how to be happy myself.

When I look back at my life 20 years ago, I had an idea
of what my values were.

But I got so confused,
because I had difficulties in finding the crowd
where I felt I belong.

I was a little a ahead with my values.

I wanted clean water, clean air and clean food.

And in the peak of the 90’ies and the 00’es these
were not common values.

I tried olive after the values of the capitalism
and the consumerism.

But little were I happy.

When I became a mum I had to go back
and remember my values in order to create

a perfect balance between my own values

and the values of my son.

It wasn’t easy and I am still working on it.

But I am doing it and I am changing.

This time deliberately.

And I like it.

If you want to know how I deal with change

please get my Freebee right here:

Change Life
Life Change

ps. I am a little late with this post, but I am trying to go with the flow, and not demand to much of myself, the astrological aspects suggests to take everything easy. And my life gets easier when I flow with the energies around us.


The best summer ever – even if the world has changed

We can all have it,

the best summer ever, even if the world has changed.

The important is not Change itself,

it’s about how we deal with change.

If we look up change in the dictionary it means:

So change can either be something we do ourself

or change can be something

that is changed from the outside.

Sometimes we change,

sometimes the circumstances we live in change.

Life can change from a moment to another –

in this case it is difficult to prepare for the change.

But still if you know how to deal with change –

it becomes easier to deal with it and go with the change.

If you have to move then it is a good example of

where you can be able to prepare for a change.

In this period of our lifetime the circumstances changed…

So we are forced to change the way we live,

even if we don’t want it to.

Some of us are not aloud to travel yet

some of us don’t have the money because we couldn’t work

some of us have to change our way of living and working.

So how to get the best summer ever?

As I point out in my Free Summer Camp

You can embrace change

and empower yourself in the change

by knowing the steps of how to deal with it.

Accepting and acknowledging

that the situation has changed are some of the first steps.

Combining mental exercises with practical exercises

can help us through the process of change.

And when I studied these different practices I

wondered:

Why

isn’t we taught about

how to prepare for certain life situations?

How do we tackle the loss of a family member?

How de we tackle long term disease?

How do we tackle if we get fired?

In my own life I have changed direction so many

times that I don’t even recall them all.

Some of the changes was deliberate –

when I left a relation after many many years.

Other changes were not deliberate –

when a roomie started a fire in my apartment.

Some of the changes I handled really well, and some

I didn’t handle that well.

And when I started studying how change and loss

actually can affect human beings I was sure about

having to share the knowledge.

Find it here –> And get the best summer ever <3

Thanks for reading

With Love

Anna Ulrike
Piece 4 Love

PS. Remember there is no fee for getting the best summer ever-

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